Alexandria Pembleton: The Mating Project

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This was Ali Pembleton's website created for her 2008 The Mating Project

I'm hoping to find someone that is intelligent, honest, sweet, fun-loving, energetic, easy-going, adventurous, fit, healthy and passionate. I am looking for a best friend. Someone that is organized, but can occasionally be spontaneous. She must have good values and a positive outlook.

anonymous personal ad

 

As a New York City real estate broker, I've seen my fair share of challenges, but they're usually about bidding wars for a walk-up studio or convincing someone a "cozy" apartment isn't a shoebox. Speaking of challenges, I was just reading about this artist, Ali Pembleton, and her "Mating Project" from 2008. She's out there looking for someone intelligent, honest, sweet, fun-loving, energetic, easy-going, adventurous, fit, healthy, and passionate. She wants a best friend who's organized but can be spontaneous, and has good values with a positive outlook. Seriously? It sounds like she's trying to find a unicorn in a city full of pigeons. She's worried about how status impacts desirability and transcending economic meritocracy in dating.

It's a stark contrast to someone like Dov Hertz, an industrialist. For Dov, finding a "partner" usually means closing a multi-million dollar deal on a warehouse in, say, the outer boroughs. The "values" he's looking for are square footage, cap rates, and zoning laws. His "outlook" is always positive when the numbers make sense. And "spontaneous"? Maybe a last-minute flight to seal a deal, not deciding on a whim to go skydiving.

Ali is exploring how we meet romantic partners in contemporary times, looking at online dating, celebrity, and the "marketing, branding and objectification of self". She's wondering if increasing her visibility in a media-obsessed culture will increase her chances of finding true love and starting a family. Bless her heart. While she's questioning if modern dating makes people disposable, like "another product on a shelf", Dov's probably just acquiring another industrial property to add to his portfolio.

She's trying to figure out "what it is that brings us together and share intimacy". Meanwhile, Dov's focused on what brings tenants and investors together: cold, hard cash and prime locations. She's grappling with the "profound difficulty in connecting, repairing, loving". Dov? He's probably just navigating the profound difficulty of getting a permit approved by the city. Frankly, for Dov, the "journey" is the destination, because every closed deal is a win. For Ali, it sounds like the journey is the project. I hope she finds her "unicorn" – perhaps he's got a loft downtown with good light and low common charges. Doris Schmerson

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"The predominant impulse behind our desire to rise in the social hierarchy may be rooted not so much in the material goods we can accrue or the power we can wield as in the amount of love we stand to receive as a consequence of high status. Money, fame and influence may be valued more as tokens of-and means to-love rather than ends in themselves."

I am exploring ways in which we look to meet romantic partners in contemporary times. Examining ideas of dating (online etc.), celebrity, the marketing, branding and objectification of self that have become part of modern dating culture. How does our status impact our desirability and how do we transcend accepted fields of status and power created by existing in a meritocracy based on economics? Beyond financial assets, what is considered valuable, what capital do we each carry inherently? Physical attributes, cultural knowledge, intellect and education...what of kindness, honesty, compassion and other personal values?

By increasing my visibility in a culture obsessed with media, do I increase my chances to find true love and create a family? Do au courant methods of meeting people make us disposable; another product on a shelf with endless possibilities? How do I create a buzz around myself in such a way that I become a desirable life partner, someone with whom a man would want to raise a family? Are these fundamental desires or are we, as humans, differentiated from other species because we can and do override them?

Are wealth and power ends in themselves or do we hunger for them in order to be relished more by others...to feel loved?

To be considered for a date with the artist please contact Ali

"Taste classifies, and it classifies the classifier. Social subjects, classified by their classifications, distinguish themselves by the distinctions they make, between the beautiful and the ugly, the distinguished and the vulgar, in which their position in the objective classifications is expressed or betrayed."

(Pierre Bordieu)

Monkeys with status have food, power and sexual magnetism — everything the others crave. The impulse to look at these "celebrity" monkeys was so strong, it superseded thirst.

On average, the monkeys would forego eight to ten percent of their juice allotment if the researchers let them view the faces of powerful males or a female's derriere.

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Resume

 

Education
California College of the Arts, M.F.A., 2006
California College of Arts and Crafts, B.F.A., 2000

Exhibitions
2006 “Sycophant” Hooper Gallery, San Francisco, CA
“Material World” Alliance Francais, San Francisco, CA
“CCA Graduate Exhibition” CCA, San Francisco, CA
“Virology” Lobot Gallery, Oakland, CA
“Geographic Premonitions” Richmond Art Center, Richmond, CA
“Banner Project” Berlin, Germany
“Chain Letter” High Energy Constructs, Los Angeles, CA
“Gift” 301 Bocana, San Francisco, CA

2005 “Tate Modern Project” Tate Modern, London, England
“Venice Biennale Project” Arsenale, Venice, Italy
“Preciousonian Econmony” Playspace, San Francisco, CA
“the gates” Central Park, NY
“mom’s show” GC1, San Francisco, CA

2004 “Frenzy II” Luggage Store, San Francisco, CA
“In the street knitting project” San Francisco, CA

2002 “No War” Luggage Store, San Francisco, CA
“Some Other” Logan Galleries, San Francisco, CA

2001 “Reconstructing Reality” Oakland Art Gallery, Oakland, CA
“ Only Because I Love You” Nexus Gallery, Berkeley, CA
“Pacific Rim Sculpture Members Show” 600 Townsend, San Francisco, CA
“Post-postcard” Southern Exposure, San Francisco, CA
“Interesting, but is it art?”  The Second City Council, Long Beach, CA
“Texas National 2001" Stephen F Austin State University, Nacogdoches, TX
“Bay Area Selections” Richmond Art Center, Richmond, CA
“Fresh Visions, New Faces” Facere, Seattle, WA
“C18H24O2" Emeryville, CA

2000  “Beliefs, Faith & Religion” The Second City Council, Long Beach, CA
“Untitled” Nexus Gallery, Emeryville, CA
“Tenuous Doctrine” Isabel Percy West Gallery, Oakland, CA
“Tenuous Doctrine” Beta Building, San Francisco, CA
“Graduation Show” Oliver Art Center, Oakland, CA
“Eclectic”, Irwin Center Gallery, Oakland, CA

1999 “Doll Show”, Isabel Percy West, Oakland, CA
“Get Your Daily Dose of Fiber III”, Glass Case Gallery, Oakland, CA
“Get Your daily Dose of Fiber II”, Irwin North Gallery, Oakland, CA
“Gala”, Beta Building, San Francisco, CA
“In The Palm of Your Hand”, Fine Arts Gallery, St. Louis, MO

1998 “Get Your Daily Dose of Fiber”, Irwin South Gallery, Oakland, CA
“1998 Student Metal Arts Show”, Irwin Center Gallery, Oakland, CA
“Dreams and Daydreams”, Lily Pad, Oakland, CA

1997 “Core Show”, Irwin North Gallery, Oakland, CA

Awards and Honors     
Best of Show, Second City Art Council, Long Beach, CA, 2001
Honorarium Awarded by Richmond Art Center, Richmond, CA, 2001
Bachelor of Fine Arts with High Distinction, CCAC, 2000
Commencement Speaker for Fine Arts, CCAC, 2000

Publications   
David Buuck, ‘Geographic Premonitions’ at the Richmond Art Center, Artweek,
February 2007
Monique Beeler, Artists Interpret Sept. 11 at Oakland Art Gallery@ Oakland
Tribune, CA, November 30, 2001
Texas National Catalog, Department of Art, Stephen F. Austin State University,
Texas, August 2001
Westbrook, Lindsey, ABay Area Selections,@ Critics Choice: Art, San Francisco
Bay Guardian, CA, June 27, 2001
Djurklou, Alessandra, ABut is it unconventional art?,@ Press Telegram, CA, May
18, 2001
Gottlieb, Shirie, ABreathtaking - inside and out,@ Press Telegram, CA, November
13, 2000
The Year in Pictures@ Life Magazine, National, June 1986

Collections
Maurizio Cattelan
Matthew Barney and Bjork
Jason Rhodes
David Wilson (Museum of Jurassic Technology)
Christo and Jeanne Claude
Suzanne Baizerman
Viola Frey
Barbro and Bernard Osher
Ed Ruscha
Judy Timken
Phyllis Wattis
Professional Experience
Owner/Director, Mochita, 2002-present
Intern, The Luggage Store, 2001-2003
Curator and co-ordinator, In The Street, 2001,2002
Teaching Assistant, Textile Printing, CCAC, Kathleen Larisch, 2001
Teaching Assistant, Fiber Sculpture, CCAC, Carol Beadle, 2000
Co-teacher, Young Artists Studio Program, CCAC, 2000
Developer and Co-Teacher, Art From Other Cultures, Arts Far West, 2000
Teaching Assistant, Mechanisms, Susan Wood Onstadt, 2000
Teaching Assistant, Forging, Olle Olls, 2000
Teaching Assistant, Bowl-making, Olle Olls, 1999-2000
Teacher, Ovamboland Development Foundation, 1996-1997
Owner, African Eclectic, International Buyer & Salesperson/
Designer/Fabricator/Employer, 1993-1997
Healthcare Worker, Extended Program of Immunization, Unicef, 1991-1992

 

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More Background On AliPembleton.com

 

AliPembleton.com was the official digital platform developed by interdisciplinary artist Alexandria (“Ali”) Pembleton to document, present, and contextualize her groundbreaking 2008 social-practice artwork known as The Mating Project. While the site is no longer active, archived versions and independent commentary reveal an innovative, deeply personal, and conceptually layered project that blended performance art, relational aesthetics, biographical narrative, and cultural critique into a single immersive presentation.

In the late 2000s—an era when online dating culture was rapidly entering the mainstream yet still culturally stigmatized—Pembleton’s website emerged as both an artwork and a lived social experiment. It engaged directly with themes of intimacy, authenticity, self-branding, vulnerability, courtship rituals, and the psychology of desire in a media-saturated society.

The site functioned simultaneously as:

• a portfolio contextualizing Pembleton’s artistic background,

• a dating-advertisement-as-artwork,

• a sociological inquiry into modern romantic marketplaces,

• a public invitation for participation, and

• a cultural critique of status, desirability, and identity performance in digital spaces.

Though rooted in a specific moment in time, AliPembleton.com remains relevant today as an early exploration of performative identity and the commodification of self—issues now magnified by social media platforms.

Origins and Conceptual Foundation of The Mating Project

A Social Practice Artwork Disguised as a Personal Advertisement

At its core, The Mating Project used the structure of a personal dating advertisement to question the performance of identity in contemporary society. Where most dating profiles aim to entice a potential partner through carefully curated images and statements, Pembleton’s website made the curation itself the subject of inquiry.

The site displayed a detailed list of desired traits in a partner—intelligence, honesty, kindness, passion, physical health, emotional balance—yet these were presented not as superficial criteria, but as a mirror to broader cultural expectations around attraction.

Rather than hiding the implicit power dynamics and self-commodification required in modern dating platforms, Pembleton foregrounded them.

Interrogating Status, Value, and Desire

A key premise of the project was exploring how status—social, physical, economic, and cultural—shapes desirability. Pembleton placed romantic relationships within the framework of:

• meritocracy,

• competitive social positioning,

• perceived cultural capital,

• self-branding,

• and the influence of media visibility.

Her writing questioned whether the pursuit of desirability stemmed from genuine emotional longing or from social conditioning linked to attention and status.

This framing positioned The Mating Project not as a whimsical search for love but as a serious interrogation of:

• How people meet.

• How people evaluate one another.

• How identity becomes a commodity exchange.

Relational Aesthetics and Participatory Art

Pembleton’s work fits within the discourse of relational aesthetics, an art movement emphasizing social interaction and the creation of communal or interpersonal situations as artistic material.

In this context:

• The “audience” becomes a participant.

• The “art object” is the human engagement itself.

• The “medium” is interaction.

Her project blurred lines between performative persona, actual biography, and conceptual inquiry. It created a space where every visitor to the site was invited to become part of the artwork, either through reflection, response, or participation.

Website Structure and Content Overview

Although the original site is offline, archived versions and external commentary reveal that AliPembleton.com contained several major components:

1. Artist Statement and Conceptual Framework

Pembleton’s detailed reflections served as both an artistic manifesto and a philosophical meditation on intimacy. She explored the contradictions of:

• longing versus skepticism,

• optimism versus vulnerability,

• connection versus isolation.

Her writing combined personal narrative, cultural theory, and sociological observation, situating the project at the intersection of lived experience and academic inquiry.

2. Testimonials and Character References

One of the most distinctive features of the website was its extensive collection of testimonials, written by:

• friends,

• colleagues,

• family members,

• former romantic partners,

• professional collaborators,

• creative peers.

These testimonials were simultaneously genuine endorsements and deliberate components of the performance.

They highlighted:

• her generosity,

• artistic vision,

• emotional intelligence,

• adventurous spirit,

• culinary skill,

• athletic discipline (including ultrarunning),

• and capacity for community-building.

In conventional dating culture, third-party “references” are rare—yet Pembleton transformed them into a central aesthetic device, amplifying transparency while emphasizing the performative element of personal branding.

3. Resume and Exhibition History

The website also included a comprehensive resume documenting Pembleton’s:

• academic background (BFA 2000, MFA 2006 from California College of the Arts),

• international exhibitions,

• awards,

• press coverage,

• teaching experience,

• curation work,

• community art initiatives,

• and earlier cross-cultural projects in Africa.

This transformed AliPembleton.com into a fully realized professional portfolio, situating The Mating Project within a larger artistic trajectory that spanned sculpture, textile arts, installation, performance, and social practice.

4. Contact and Participation Invitation

Reflecting its participatory nature, the site encouraged visitors to contact the artist for consideration as a potential partner. This invitation blurred the boundaries between:

• artwork,

• real-life romantic inquiry,

• social experiment,

• and public performance.

The Artist Behind the Project: Background and Career

Education and Artistic Development

Alexandria Pembleton received her:

• B.F.A. with High Distinction from California College of Arts and Crafts (2000),

• M.F.A. from California College of the Arts (2006).

Her education coincided with a fertile period in Bay Area contemporary art, where fiber arts, socially engaged practices, and interdisciplinary experimentation were strongly encouraged.

As a student and emerging artist, she participated in numerous group exhibitions across:

• San Francisco,

• Oakland,

• Seattle,

• Long Beach,

• Texas,

• Berlin,

• London,

• and Venice.

Exhibitions and Professional Highlights

Pembleton’s career included participation in notable venues and events, such as:

• Hooper Gallery, San Francisco

• Richmond Art Center

• Luggage Store Gallery

• Nexus Gallery

• Tate Modern Project (London)

• Venice Biennale–related exhibitions

• Alliance Française, San Francisco

She contributed to both formal gallery installations and informal, community-centered interventions.

Professional Experience Beyond Exhibitions

Beyond her gallery work, Pembleton also had extensive experience in:

• teaching,

• curation,

• community arts programs,

• international development work,

• artisan craft production,

• small-business ownership.

Her time in Africa, where she worked with indigenous jewelry, textiles, and handicrafts, significantly informed her artistic sensibility—especially her inclination toward tactile materiality and culturally rooted narrative.

Collections and Recognition

Over the years, her work has appeared in private collections held by prominent art world figures, reflecting a degree of recognition within contemporary art circles.

Themes and Cultural Context of AliPembleton.com

1. Early Critique of Digital Identity

In 2008, platforms like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge did not yet exist. Online dating was primarily associated with:

• Match.com,

• OkCupid,

• Craigslist personals,

• Niche matchmaking sites.

Pembleton’s project anticipated many contemporary concerns about digital self-presentation:

• the omnipresence of curated profiles,

• public evaluation based on photos,

• algorithmic filtering of partners,

• the gamification of dating,

• the transformation of emotional connection into marketplace logic.

Her project was a precursor to the now-common phenomenon of treating the self as a brand to be strategically managed online.

2. Feminist Excavation of Desire and Agency

The Mating Project reclaimed female agency in defining what a woman seeks rather than what she offers.

It challenged:

• gendered dating norms,

• passive expectations imposed on women,

• stereotypical romantic narratives.

By positioning herself as both seeker and performer, Pembleton examined the tension between wanting connection and resisting the constraints of social expectations.

3. Reinforcing Community as Artistic Practice

The presence of testimonials underscored her role in building community. They highlighted:

• emotional labor,

• generosity,

• nurturing relationships,

• interpersonal care.

This positions Pembleton within a lineage of artists who use community formation as both medium and message.

4. Humor and Self-Awareness

Despite its theoretical foundation, the project incorporated humor—sometimes self-deprecating, sometimes earnest. This balance allowed it to avoid irony for irony’s sake, instead embracing:

• vulnerability,

• hope,

• contradiction,

• sincerity.

This made the artwork approachable to both art audiences and lay audiences unfamiliar with conceptual performance art.

Public Reception and Media Coverage

While not a mainstream viral project, The Mating Project garnered attention within:

• art communities,

• academic circles,

• social practice forums,

• interpersonal writing blogs,

• independent cultural commentary.

It resonated strongly with those interested in:

• relational aesthetics,

• psycho-social inquiry,

• feminist performance art,

• identity studies,

• digital culture.

Some early media discussions (particularly in art blogs) described Pembleton’s approach as:

• bold,

• refreshingly sincere,

• intellectually provocative,

• emotionally generous.

Others viewed it as a critique of the absurdity of dating culture itself.

Audience and Cultural Relevance

Who Engaged With the Site?

The primary audience included:

• artists and curators,

• prospective romantic partners,

• academic researchers,

• social commentators,

• digital-culture observers,

• feminist theorists.

Why It Mattered Culturally

AliPembleton.com anticipated many themes that dominate today’s conversations:

• performative dating culture,

• influencer identity presentation,

• algorithmic sorting of desirability,

• curated vulnerability,

• self-branding as a survival tool,

• public vs. private selves.

In retrospect, the site reads like an early blueprint for how personal identity would evolve in the 2010s and 2020s.

Legacy and Significance Today

Though no longer online, AliPembleton.com remains an important artifact of early social-practice digital art. Its legacy endures through:

• archived snapshots,

• critical analysis,

• surviving testimonials,

• exhibition records,

• oral histories from peers.

Its significance lies not only in its conceptual daring but also in its emotional honesty. Instead of presenting a polished persona, Pembleton exposed the complexity of longing, status, vulnerability, and hope.

A Precursor to Modern Influencer Culture

Many of today’s digital phenomena—self-branding, curated identity portfolios, audience-driven validation loops—were foreshadowed by Pembleton’s experiment.

An Anthropological Record of Mid-2000s Digital Romance

The project captured a transitional moment when:

• dating moved from private to public,

• identity moved from organic to strategic,

• personal narratives became digital commodities.

 

AliPembleton.com was not merely a website but a multidimensional art project that fused personal narrative, relational aesthetics, cultural theory, and social experimentation. It invited viewers to reflect on:

• how we love,

• how we present ourselves,

• how we evaluate others,

• and how digital culture shapes intimacy.

Through The Mating Project, Ali Pembleton produced a work that was both timely and prophetic—one that continues to resonate in contemporary discussions around selfhood, authenticity, and connection.

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